Just Be Held

       For the first time in a while, I feel refreshed and motivated. It has been a long busy year and if I am honest most weeks I have met with a feeling of exhaustion before I ever got to work on Monday. Just the sense of everything I needed to accomplish during the week hung over my head and made me drag my feet, but I feel excited to start the week today. There isn't less to do this week than any other, in fact there's probably more. There wasn't some family party or special event over the weekend that helped to lift my spirits and make me feel more relaxed. There wasn't an inspirational sermon that helped me to refocus and feel excited again. But something did happen that has totally lifted the burden of the week from me and helped me to feel refreshed and ready to handle anything life has for me today.
       Since about the middle of last week, and even off and on before that, I have been seeing verses that either say to wait on the Lord, or be still and know He is God.  I even woke up several mornings with a line from a song in my head that said "just be held." I didn't understand why I kept seeing this message so much except that God was trying to get my attention but I wasn't sure what this was pertaining too. I thought I was resting in Him,  I prayed every morning for His help, guidance, and that He would help me to stay on track throughout the day. It happened too much to ignore though, and so finally I started to pay attention.
       This morning I as I prepared for work I talked to God as usual and during prayer began to worry that I had missed an appointment last week, then I got upset at myself for being so thoughtless. As I racked my brains trying to remember for certain if we had rescheduled or not I started to feel a little nudge to let go, a reminder that I was once again working myself up over something that could be easily discovered or fixed if need be. It was after this that I finally I got it, finally I understood. I was tired and grumpy not because of what I had going on, but because I was trying to do it in my own strength. I realized as I worked through the stress this morning and the root cause of it became clear that I wasn't working with God towards these goals, I was rushing myself to get to the finish line, I was pushing myself as hard as I could and not letting go of the situation. I realized I had once again fallen into the trap of  hyper focusing on the situations and what I could do, instead of being held in His comfort. Sure, I was talking to God about what was going on, but I wasn't giving it to Him, pretty much I was just dictating my schedule to God.
        I'm not saying it isn't good to go over your plans with God, scripture tells us that man plans his way but it is God who establishes his steps (Proverbs 16:9). So I think this is a really good practice to get into because God will lead you in which way to go when you go to Him with your plans. The problem arises when you start doing what I did, where you aren't seeking Him to lead, guide and establish your way and plans, but are pretty much just telling God "ok I gotta get this done then, then this at such and such a time."  God is not our personal assistant, He is God, He is our Creator, and to be blunt, He could wipe any of us from existence if He so chose. So my point today is, just be held. Don't get carried away in the hustle and bustle like I did, don't start treating God like a day planner, go to Him with your plans and ask Him to lead you in His will. Be blessed.

Exodus 33:14   
And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

Proverbs 16:3   
Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.

Proverbs 19:21   
Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.

Jeremiah 31:25   
For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.”