Focus on the Lord

       The last four or five days I have felt very discouraged, I find myself wondering when this struggle will end, its been since November with the end no where in site. I am finding it harder each day to push on and stay positive, to want to keep going, to want to keep trying. My body literally aches from the amount of stress I am under right now, and I find that I am exhausted all of the time. My body and mind tell me to stop, to let it go and stop trying so hard, why should I being doing so much of the work? Why should I care when no one else seems to? Why should I keep trying and pressing on when it doesn't seem to matter or make difference? But my spirit says something all together different.
       In my spirit I know that the end is closer than it feels, in my spirit I know I am doing what is right, what is good and pleasing to my Father. In my spirit I know it is really Him I am serving by my actions and not man. In my spirit I am reminded that my strength comes from the Lord, and that in Him there is always hope. In my spirit I know that I can call upon the Lord for help and comfort, I know that in Jesus there is always purpose for the pain, for this struggle, and that all this suffering will produce something beautiful to glorify the Father.
       This morning I was pretty down, but I'm getting better as I lean on God and spend time in the Word. Currently I am reading 1 Samuel, and as the Lord would have it I read about Saul pursuing David with the intent to kill him, and I started to relate to David. His circumstances were by far worse than mine are, but it was the relentlessness of the pursuit and David's attitude and actions that I related too. Why? Because even though he could have on two separate occasions ended the pursuit by taking Saul's life and taken the throne as God's appointed leader, he instead let Saul go. Saul was also anointed by God and David knew he was never to kill the anointed of God, so despite the urging of his men, David allowed Saul to live and did what was right by God regardless of the pressures of the others. Saul's pursuit of David exiled David from his home land, Saul took David's wife and gave her to another man, Saul attempted to murder David! And still David choose to do what was right, and in the end he was given what was promised to him, in the end Saul would be dead by his own hands, and David became King over Israel.
       It is easy to read that and get hope, and it did give me hope too, and I'm thankful for that as well as the wonderful encouraging people the Lord has used to comfort and pray with or for me today. But there was something else in there that I read today that gave me relief. See, I may not have someone pursuing me to destroy my flesh like David did, but my spirit has been under assault week after week with one attack after another, one set back on top of another, and it left me depleted, feeling low, and starting to doubt the promises I have. Then I read 1 Samuel 27:1; which says "1 And David said in his heart, I shall now perish one day by the hand of Saul: there is nothing better for me than that I should speedily escape into the land of the Philistines; and Saul shall despair of me, to seek me any more in any coast of Israel: so shall I escape out of his hand." I read that verse and responded in my heart with, 'he took his eyes off the promise, he knows that Saul's attempts won't succeed because of the promise the Lord made him, David knows that Saul won't kill him, he's just doubting because of what is going on.' Then the light bulb came on, and I knew that's what I had done too. I quickly realized I was like Peter when he was called onto the water, I was looking at the storm and not Jesus; and because of that I was sinking just like Peter.
     It took time, and a lot of prayer to refocus my mind on higher things, but I'm doing much better now. I see what I did, what David did, and Peter too, and now I am doing whatever I can to let go of the struggles and hurt; and focus on the Lord instead. It's easy to get swept away in the currents of the turbulent sea around us, but we must remember to keep our eyes on Jesus, because it is then that we can walk on water. It is then that we are gifted with the strength and endurance to make it to the end of this season and into the next. Be blessed my brothers and sisters, and keep your eyes on Yeshua!

Proverbs 2:2-5
Making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.

Isaiah 26:3   
You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.

1 Matthew 14:29-31

29 “Come,” he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” 

Philippians 4:8

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things [are] honest, whatsoever things [are] just, whatsoever things [are] pure, whatsoever things [are] lovely, whatsoever things [are] of good report; if [there be] any virtue, and if [there be] any praise, think on these things.

Romans 8:5

For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit.

1 Peter 3:17

For [it is] better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing.