In five weeks I'll be unemployed for the second time in my adult life. I'm looking for work opportunities, like free lance writing, work from home customer service opportunities, babysitting jobs where it won't be a problem to have them at my home or bring my baby to their home when the baby comes and I'm even considering doing speaking engagements for churches, woman's groups, or small conferences, if I can figure out how to get those opportunities going. And although I currently have nothing, oddly I'm not worried or stressed. I was a few weeks ago but now I just have confidence that Abba will provide for me. He gave me a word at the start of this season and I knew then that this whole transition would be about learning to trust His provision, and honestly it scared me at first, for weeks I went back and forth between fear and trust, but not anymore.
Over, and over through this whole thing I have seen provision made when I put down my worries and just stood on the word He gave me from Matthew. Over and over God has used the Holy Spirit to remind Nick and myself of His promise, if He provides for the birds He will provide for us too (Matthew 6:26), and we are walking in that promise, trusting our Father together. Which honestly, is a miracle in itself, because we have both struggled in the past with trusting God completely when it came to provision of this magnitude. But God is not failing us, He is keeping His word and we are grateful to see His grace and provision, grateful for this chance to go deeper in our relationships with Him.
And going deeper is exactly what is happening. As we progress through this season of life I am seeing so many changes in my husband and myself. A new strength to our faith and a deeper love growing in each of us toward each other and towards our Heavenly Father. We are coming to a deeper and more intimate place as we lay down worry and hold onto Jesus, a place I can't quite yet put into words, but it's a place of peace, a place of trust, a place of hope and a place where we do not feel bogged down by worrying but feel confident despite what the circumstances look like at the moment.
For a while now I have understood that where there is peace there is God, and this feeling I have during this crazy season of my life tells me that my Lord is in the midst of it with me, and because of that understanding I cannot fear. As I write that I am reminded of a verse from probably one of the most commonly known Psalms, one that I can very much relate to at the moment, Psalm 23:4 "Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." I have realized recently that though fear is quite natural in the flesh as new creations in Christ, with new hearts and new spirits (Ezekiel 36:26; 2 Corinthians 5:17; John 3:3; Romans 6:4), it is no longer natural to us, we have the choice to fear or to trust, and the strength to overcome the temptation of fear. And today I encourage you to enter that place, the place where your flesh wants to fear but your spirit is stronger and you choose to hold onto the savior tighter than your worry. I encourage you to let the peace of the Holy Spirit over take you so that you too can witness miracles as God works on your behalf. Be blessed now and always, in Yeshua's name.
Psalm 28:7
The Lord is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him.
Psalm 112:7
He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm, trusting in the Lord.
Mark 5:36
But overhearing what they said, Jesus said to the ruler of the synagogue, “Do not fear, only believe.”
Romans 15:13
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope
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